Sometimes the scariest thing about moving to a new place, or even traveling solo can be the thought of doing things alone. As an only child this generally scares me less than most people (probably a good skill to have on this journey)… but it can still be daunting to seemingly start from scratch. Here are some ideas to help you break out of your comfort zone and find some new folks to talk to the next time you’re someplace new.
Start with who you already know
We all use social media in various degrees, some just for checking up on family, some trying to become the next big influencer. The rest of us probably fall somewhere in between. With that said, you know more people than you think! When you’re planning on going to a new place, send out a post or insta story to your friends / followers. Ask for recommendations on places to go / things to do / what to eat in that location. See if anyone would be willing to show you around for an hour or give you some insider local tips over coffee (socially distanced of course). See if anyone would be willing to have a phone call or zoom lunch date to give you that info if they don’t want to meet up in person. You never know, re-connecting with that long lost high school friend could at least start an interesting conversation and you could end up with a new favorite restaurant.
2. Use your school systems
I went to boarding school (as a day student, I lived 10 minutes away), I went to college & grad school, and I was in a sorority. All of those organizations have alumni networks. Most cities or areas will have alumni groups or outings or a special bar where they watch sporting events. Check out your high school / college / greek life alumni page to see what kind of activities you could be a part of in your new spot. If there aren’t scheduled meetups or activities, you might still be able to find out which alums are located in your new place that might be willing to show you around.
3. Use your interests
There are a lot of apps like Meetup that will put people with similar interests together to hang out for an hour or two. Anything from playing D&D to going on a hike, there might be something for you. I recently started loving needlepoint (I needed a new craft after sewing what seemed like dozens of masks in 2020…) and it turns out that if you check on Instagram, there are stitch clubs in most major cities that meet up once a month to “sip and stitch”. The same could be said for most hobbies. Do you love to cook, to take photos, to play ultimate frisbee… there is probably a class you could take or a league you could join where you could meet some local folks. Best part, you already know you have something in common!
4. Use your work
I’m a structural engineer by day, and as a licensed professional, there are a few national and state organizations related to my job. For me that includes ASCE (American Society of Civil Engineers) and NSPE (National Society of Professional Engineers). These professional societies will have local chapters to offer continuing education programming along with social events. For me, some of these events cost money since they also give me continuing education credits (which I need for my license) or include a dinner + lecture, so they aren’t as easy as the first three options. But if you’re in a profession with national societies linked to it, definitely check them out both for social connections and networking opportunities.
5. The tried and true, find a cool bar and talk to people there
What makes a bar “cool” to one person vs the next is very subjective. It tells you a lot about how a person wants to socialize by the places they choose to hang out. So find some places that look cool to you, grab a drink or dinner at the bar, and say hello to your bartender or your bar buddy. This might sound a bit daunting, but worst case… you have a drink and find a new bar to try out if this one isn’t your cup of tea. We all need to eat, may as well be friendly.
“Get to know your bartender. This is most important.” - Al Palmer, Montreal Confidential
I hope this list gave you some ideas on how to get out of your comfort zone and meet some new people when you take that next trip or move to a new place. Do you have any other tactics you swear by? Leave them below!
~ Victoria